How I do love a good Sunday. My favourite day of the week is Saturday, but since being in Germany Sunday is up there with the cool kids. What made this Sunday spectacularly memorable? Well, I talked to my parents for quite some time. I'm happy to announce that my dad is totally hip with the times and has downloaded what's app so that he can text me more often. I'm thrilled that my family is trying to keep in touch with me. With distance, you can loose so many friendships and connections with the people you love. This happens so often with singers because we are constantly moving and re-routing to different places. Sometimes it feels like I'm living in a dream world because nothing is concrete and stable. I am so close with my family, but it is not uncommon for me to not talk to them for weeks at a time. It was so good to hear their voices and know they are healthy, safe and keeping well. I never want to take them for granted and always want them to know they are such an important part of who I am. I have complete and utter respect for each member in my immediate family - especially my father. He is the most honest, dedicated and loving man I have ever known. Not only is he a fantastic doctor, but as a child he still managed to take me on bike rides, teach me how to play tennis, come to my singing competitions, attend my soccer games, dry my tears and pick me up during the hard times. He has always been there for me one thousand percent and continues to be there.
To say I am homesick would be an understatement. Don't get me wrong, Magdeburg is wonderful. I had a jam packed weekend of shows and gatherings, but home is always home. I spent the entire day catching up with people who mean the world to me. A big shout out to Facebook for making it possible for me to connect with my family and friends in such an enjoyable manner. Such a lazy, but important day. I received so much good news today from back home. I talked to some of my favourite girl friends in the States, and had the best conversation with Lucas Klausen. We have been through everything together. Yeah, um literally.....everything.... He knows me better than I know myself.
I honestly was so tempted to just book a flight back home just so I could just have dinner with all the people I love. I would book a table in China town, we would all have dim sum or Ethiopian food and just talk and laugh. I wish we all had star ship enterprise pins and that we could just "beam me up Scotty" to wherever we wanted to go. But it all traces back to the bitter sweet nature of this life. One of my favourite movies is Vanilla Sky or the orginial Abre Los Ojos. There is a fantastic quote where a character says the sweet just isn't sweet if you don't know what bitter tastes like. I know I wrote something similar in my last post, but this resonates so strongly within me. I've only been in Magdeburg since October 1st, and I've already experienced pain, hurt, utter joy, heart felt laughter as well as disappointment. All things are linked, and most of all have made me stronger. As my 30th birthday approaches, I wish to enter this decade with grace, beauty, wisdom and be granted the ability to forgive. I'm like a fine wine baby.... better with age.
Oh, that last sentence was the perfect lead in to my new topic of discussion. I wanted to write something about confidence. My confidence was recently analyzed at a party. Totally weird I know. When I'm at a party I like to scope out the free booze and food. All class right here. Heh heh heh... Oh how I like to digress. So, anyone who has met this brown sugar knows I like to have fun, play the occasional dress up, and dance. However, a few people think my mad dancing skills, fancy high heels and over the top clothing reflected a lack of confidence. Very interesting to me. My first reaction was people, I'm a opera singer. Fashion just goes with the territory. The first thing we do when we are in a production is ask about our costume. Second point: would I move to a whole new country if I was not confident - let alone a non english speaking country? It then occured to me that perhaps this was a cultural difference. For example, people do not really dress up in
East Germany. Then I just stopped thinking about it all together because
it was so retarded. The fact is, I'm never going to apologize for being a crazy, tutu wearing dancing machine. No one is 100% confident at all times. If you are reading this and feel you embody confidence in everything you do, I urge you to write a book about this for all us sub par humans. I think you could make some good money. All jokes aside, judgmental people really irritate me. I just would have hoped that people would take the time to get to know me before coming to such silly conclusions. As the big 3-0 comes closer I have realized that I just want to surround myself with good, wholesome and honest people who strive to spread love and not hate. I wonder what epiphanies I will have once 40 rolls around?!
So, what else is there to tell. Let's change the subject to something more cheerful. Oh, yes. I have a gig coming up. I'm singing in a Schubert Mass on December 2nd. I have my first rehearsal with the orchestra tomorrow. I'm pretty stoked about this. One of the ladies in the ensemble recommended me so it's always nice to know you are in good standings with your colleagues. I might wear my tutu to the first rehearsal. Oh, I just could not help myself on that one! I'm a funny one. This week is filled with rehearsals for our premiere of Midsummer. I luckily have Thursday off and I'm thinking I might visit Weimar then (my old stomping grounds.) I miss my friend Michelle very much and a good night of wine, cheese and anti pasti is definitely in order. The only problem is trains are often expensive over here. The Deutche Bahn has such a monopoly over travel, but I plan to use mitfahrgelegenheit to get there. If you don't know what that is you really need to google it. I think it is Germany's greatest claims to fame of recent. It's an online carpooling service that gets you from point A to B for a fraction of the price. Incredible I KNOW! Anyway, I hope I can find a ride.
I just looked at my clock and realized it's almost 2 in the morning. I need my beauty sleep!
Good night world.
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